Verse 1 - The Begining

We were chatting after 3 years, u blocked me for the most ridiculous reasons, haha. Remember me asking u your race, after telling me and me replying, u said "why? something bothering you? dun worry, i dun bite". Remembered the 1st time i asked u out was on valentine's day after days of chatting. I was 20 i guess and you 16. You told me your address and i have no idea where that is =.= so i kinda asked ur god bro for direction. He brought me directly to your house, i was feeling kinda nervous, dunno why. He said "u remember already? i aint bringing u here anymore u know" and i was like "erm... ok.. i think i got it". On the way out to a restaurant nearby, i sorta blured out, i think i forgot where ur house is =.=|||. knowing he aint gonna bring me for another, i just kept it to myself. Later that day after he sent me home, i drove out in search of your house again, luckily the road i took was the right one and i somehow got lost in a junction or 2, but i somehow manage to find ur house. I never tend to remember directions properly unless i'm driving, heh =.=. And wat's more surprising is that u lived so close by, guess we're fated eh?

Tomorrow is valentine's day, I've prepared the whole nite just for today. What to say, what to do, bla bla bla... but when i saw you, i was totally speechless =.= love at 1st sight maybe? i dunno, i dun really know until our movies together, when we talk to each other, when u bump into me and when u held my hands.

The day ends and i sent u back, hoping that we could spend a little more time together. I was almost out of your house's simpang when u smsed me that u have nothing to eat at home, "alrite this is my chance, its now or never", i picked u up again... we went to mamih and ur god bro joined in.

Remembered that i dun have a car of my own yet that time, my dad needed to use the car so i had to go home 1st and he sent me back to mamih afterwards where i join u and ur god bro again. I remember when ur god bro was sending me home 1st with you in the car. He made a joke asking me to chase after you. Like wtheck =.= i was already planning to do that and i somehow know that u'll accept too. But i dunno... its like, i'm certain you'll accept yet afraid that i might be wrong.

I said the silliest thing trying to get you as my girl didn't i.

The next day i proposed, u said yes and there, we're together. Everlasting 152<3 me and you.
Remembered how mad u were when i didn't hold your hand in yayasan ^^
And how your mood just came back once i held your hand =.=

We started out sweet like any other relationship. We made promises to each other, promises that's so hard to keep. I came to realize that words like "i'll be with you forever" means nothing at all. Though its nice to hear it, at least, we'll feel more secure. Remembered that i can't live without you and u can't live without me too. We steal a kiss every chance we get. So what happened? i wonder. I used to be afraid of loosing you that's why i put up with most of the shits u said. I guess it goes the same for you baby.

It was time for me to go further my studies outside. Did u know? that when i see u cry, i wished so much to stay, yet i cant, i just cant. Alot of things happened during the time i was overseas. I somehow got the courage to go against ur will. Guess i'm not so afraid of loosing you anymore baby. But becos of that, i was over confident and took advantage becos i knew u'll never leave me. Things got out of hand and u left me for another. Regrets, hate, doubts, hope, love, insecurity, trusts, etc, we felt that all during that time. U left me during the most critical time =.= when i knew that u're not mine anymore and that u had someone else, i sorta flunked my degree and rush back asap. That's when we 1st slapped each other =.=

2 months later i remember i sms u about something and u replied saying that u wanted to see me. U have no idea how happy i was. We got back together after sometime, but the things u did really left a deep mark in my heart. I was so focused on revenge and you had no rights at all in my heart. I treated u badly and even got another girl. I was glad i picked u in the end. But my way towards you haven't improve and you left once more.

During that time, I never realized that i would feel so horrible when u left again. I started chasing you back like a mad man. Put alot of effort in it just to get you back again. Didn't know that u'd actually come back. Made a promise never to mistreat u again.

We got together just fine for a few months until something came up again =.= guess i expected too much from you too fast. Scolding you with vulgar words, hurting you and i never realized it. You left again, and this time i guess this is it. Nevertheless, i still chase after u like crazy =.=||| gotta admit, if not for this break up, i would've never learn my lesson. During the months we were apart, i learn the biggest lesson in life and i wrote it down "the 30 days without my baby". Finding ways to improve myself in hope that u'll come back one day. Guess what, we got back together again after all the flowers, all the surprises... girl, you're hard to get back u know that? but its all worth it, to see ur smile, to hear ur voice, to have you by my side again.

We really did change ever since the 1st time we meet each other huh baby? i never used vulgar words against u anymore and you automatically changed ur temper for me. I was very happy being with you. Then things started happening again *urgh*. I guess i was too focus on my work trying to make a brighter future for both of us that i forgot about ur existence. Neglected you in a way and never realized that u're all alone at home. When u needed me i wasn't there. When i started realizing, preparing for the surprise of ur life, i was too late.

So here we are, apart from each other once more. My only regret was that i never get to treat u the way i should, the way u wanted. Guess the chances of getting you back are slimmer than before.

Its been 3 and a half year now haven't it baby? alot of happy memories and painful memories lingers in our heart and mind. Missed those days we use to laugh together, go out together and do things for each other. I've learn my lesson baby, would you give me another chance? *sigh*.... if i have the chance to do it all over again, it'll be so different.

Here's a song i've been listening to, dunno if there's any meaning to it for ya'll, but it sure is meaningful to me...

Akon - Keep You Much Longer

"Keep You Much Longer"

Wish I could keep you much longer
I know you gotta go cuz you got things to do
Wish I could keep you much longer
Now you to busy for me girl like I was to you

Wish I could stop by
And maybe say hi
Wish I could jus stop by
And lay by your side

The tables have turned
And I've finally learned
That this is makin up for every day I was gone
And that's why I'm concerned
But now it's confirmed
That you spread your wings and learned to fly all alone

Darkness in the night
I'll find that light for you
As long as I got eyes
I'll have a sight for you
Long as I am alive baby I'd die for you
I wanna be with you

Wish I could keep you much longer
I know you gotta go cuz you got things to do
Wish I could keep you much longer
Now you to busy for me girl like I was to you

Wish I could stop by
And maybe say hi
Wish I could jus stop by
And lay by your side

You're always on my mind
While I'm racin
While I'm paper chasin
You were there when I said one day I'd get up out that basement
Playin as my agent
For you, there's no replacement
You will always be my girl
And you can hold me on that statement

Darkness in the night
I'll find that light for you
As long as I got eyes
I'll have a sight for you
Long as I am alive baby I'd die for you
Wanna be with you

Wish I could keep you much longer
I know you gotta go cuz you got things to do
Wish I could keep you much longer
Now you to busy for me girl like I was to you

Wish I could stop by
And maybe say hi
Wish I could jus stop by
And lay by your side

Baby I know you
And how we do
Doin exactly what I taught you
Gotta get that money first
Before you come spend that precious time with your boo
And I know I gotta just take it
Even though it's drivin me crazy
Always wanted to see my girl make it

Wish I could keep you much longer
I know you gotta go cuz you got things to do
Wish I could keep you much longer
Now you to busy for me girl like I was to you

Wish I could keep you so much longer

Wish I could stop by
And maybe say "hi"
Wish I could jus stop by
And lay by your side

Wish I could keep you much longer
I know you gotta go cuz you got things to do
Wish I could keep you much longer
Now you to busy for me girl like I was to you

Wish I could keep you baby
I just wanna keep you longer

How i wish to keep you longer in my arms. Waking with you by my side everyday. Eating together with you on every meals.

Come back soon baby, i miss u alot... <3